Marriage Assessment
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ASSESSMENT for Married Couples
This assessment is designed to help you and your spouse gain a better understanding of where you are in your marriage in five categories. The results of this survey will help you and your spouse determine which five commitments to focus on the most. It’s important to be authentic and honest in your answers.
After answering the questions, tabulate your scores for each section to see how well you are doing in those areas. A good idea is to separately answer and then come together and see how close you are, then decide on a number together.
On a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 being definitely not true and 5 being definitely true, answer each question below.
SECTION 1: SEEKING GOD
_______ I regularly spend time alone praying and reading the Bible.
_______ We regularly spend time praying and reading the Bible together.
_______ Seeking God is a priority in my marriage.
_______ We regularly attend church together.
_______ God is the number one priority in our life.
TOTAL SCORE: _______
SECTION 2: FIGHT FAIR
_______ My spouse and I fight fair.
_______ My spouse and I effectively manage conflict in our marriage.
_______ My spouse and I communicate openly and honestly.
_______ My spouse listens when I’m talking.
_______ We are careful to guard our anger and our words with each other.
TOTAL SCORE: _______
SECTION 3: HAVE FUN
_______ My spouse and I are intentional about taking time to talk with each other.
_______ My spouse and I have regularly scheduled date nights.
_______ My spouse and I have activities we often enjoy doing together.
_______ We are pleased with the frequency and quality of our sexual relationship.
_______ My spouse and I enjoy a high level of intimacy with each other.
TOTAL SCORE: _______
SECTION 4: STAY PURE
_______ My spouse and I have our own accountability partners.
_______ My spouse and I have a high level of trust with each other.
_______ We have taken proactive steps to prevent impurities from entering our marriage.
_______ We have set boundaries when it comes to how we interact with the opposite sex.
_______ My spouse and I feel that purity is not a weakness in our marriage.
TOTAL SCORE: _______
SECTION 5: NEVER GIVE UP
_______ My spouse and I have never used the word divorce.
_______ My spouse and I support each other during difficult times.
_______ When it comes to our marriage, my spouse and I tend to be positive instead of negative.
_______ My spouse and I feel our marriage is in a great place.
_______ My spouse and I are not selfish with each other in our marriage.
TOTAL SCORE: _______
IF YOUR SCORE FOR EACH SECTION IS:
25-21: Your relationship is very strong in this area.
20-15: Your relationship is doing okay in this area, but some work is needed.
14-10: Your relationship is struggling in this area, and you need to take steps to improve.
9-5: This is a major problem area for your marriage that requires immediate help.
Assessment for Engaged Couples
This assessment is designed to help you and your future spouse gain a better understanding of where you currently are in your relationship in five areas. The results of this survey will help you and your future spouse determine which of these five commitments to focus on the most as you are building the foundation for your new marriage. It’s important to be authentic and honest in your answers.
After answering the questions, tabulate your scores for each section to see how well you are doing in those areas. A good idea is to separately answer and then come together and see how close you are, then decide on a number together.
On a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 being definitely not true and 5 being definitely true, answer each question below.
SECTION 1: SEEKING GOD
_______ I regularly spend time alone praying and reading the Bible.
_______ My future spouse and I regularly spend time praying and reading the Bible together.
_______ Seeking God is a priority in our relationship.
_______ We regularly attend church together.
_______ God is the number one priority in our life.
TOTAL SCORE: _______
SECTION 2: FIGHT FAIR
_______ My future spouse and I fight fair.
_______ My future spouse and I effectively manage conflict in our relationship.
_______ My future spouse and I communicate openly and honestly.
_______ My future spouse listens when I’m talking.
_______ My future spouse and I are careful to guard our anger and our words with each other.
TOTAL SCORE: _______
SECTION 3: HAVE FUN
_______ My future spouse and I are intentional about taking time to talk.
_______ My future spouse and I have a great time on dates.
_______ My future spouse and I have activities we often enjoy doing together.
_______ My future spouse and I would rather spend time together than apart.
_______ My future spouse and I enjoy trying new activities together.
TOTAL SCORE: _______
SECTION 4: STAY PURE
_______ My future spouse and I have our own accountability partners.
_______ My future spouse and I have a high level of trust with each other.
_______ My future spouse and I have taken proactive steps to prevent impurities from entering into our future marriage.
_______ My spouse and I have set boundaries to remain pure until marriage.
_______ My future spouse and I have remained pure with each other while dating.
TOTAL SCORE: _______
SECTION 5: NEVER GIVE UP
_______ My future spouse and I feel like we have a strong vision for our marriage.
_______ My future spouse and I support each other during difficult times.
_______ When it comes to our relationship, we tend to be positive instead of negative.
_______ My future spouse and I feel our relationship is in a great place.
_______ My future spouse and I are not selfish with each other.
TOTAL SCORE: _______
IF YOUR SCORE FOR EACH SECTION IS:
25-21: Your relationship is very strong in this area.
20-15: Your relationship is doing okay in this area, but some work is needed.
14-10: Your relationship is struggling in this area, and you need to take steps to improve.
9-5: This is a major problem area for your marriage that requires immediate help.